212

It's so nice. I didn't notice before just how many thoughts and feelings I was suppressing on other sites. I never realized how exhausting keeping that up was until I started pulling away from those places.

When I was a "trans ally" (and in my trans-identified phase) I was so drained from the all tiptoeing around eggshells. I was constantly second-guessing myself out of fear. Even in private conversations I feared tripping some invisible wire.

I'm glad I started "hate reading" radical feminist material. Almost every time I hate read a radfem blog I would begrudgingly admit to myself "okay, they have a point there." I did that over and over, comparing it to what other trans people were saying, until eventually I understood that I had been duped. I couldn't play pretend anymore. It took time but I realized that the way my trans friends and I saw the world was little more than a distorted fantasy. Trans ideology was a sham.

Very slowly, I desisted and started critically thinking for myself. Fastforward a bit and here I am today.

Ovarit isn't perfect. Women aren't perfect. There are women here that I disagree with and stances I'm not convinced of. But there are also conversations that make me think and reconsider my perspective based on actual evidence and reason. (Imagine that! Opinions based on something other than thought-terminating slogans.) The consciouness-raising and connecting we do here keep me on my toes. I'm always learning something new. Feminist activism isn't easy. It's painful being reminded just how deep the well of misogyny goes. But you know what? I don't have that constant looming worry that I'll say something to get me tar and feathered on Ovarit. At most the conversation gets heated. The imporant thing is that we're actually having conversations. Incredible what women can do when not being threatened or harassed, isn't it?

I wish more women could experience the relief I'm feeling right now. EDIT: Typos.

It's so nice. I didn't notice before just how many thoughts and feelings I was suppressing on other sites. I never realized how exhausting keeping that up was until I started pulling away from those places. When I was a "trans ally" (and in my trans-identified phase) I was so drained from the all tiptoeing around eggshells. I was constantly second-guessing myself out of fear. Even in private conversations I feared tripping some invisible wire. I'm glad I started "hate reading" radical feminist material. Almost every time I hate read a radfem blog I would begrudgingly admit to myself "okay, they have a point there." I did that over and over, comparing it to what other trans people were saying, until eventually I understood that I had been duped. I couldn't play pretend anymore. It took time but I realized that the way my trans friends and I saw the world was little more than a distorted fantasy. Trans ideology was a sham. Very slowly, I desisted and started critically thinking for myself. Fastforward a bit and here I am today. Ovarit isn't perfect. Women aren't perfect. There are women here that I disagree with and stances I'm not convinced of. But there are also conversations that make me think and reconsider my perspective based on actual evidence and reason. (Imagine that! Opinions based on something other than thought-terminating slogans.) The consciouness-raising and connecting we do here keep me on my toes. I'm always learning something new. Feminist activism isn't easy. It's painful being reminded just how deep the well of misogyny goes. But you know what? I don't have that constant looming worry that I'll say something to get me tar and feathered on Ovarit. At most the conversation gets heated. The imporant thing is that we're actually having conversations. Incredible what women can do when not being threatened or harassed, isn't it? I wish more women could experience the relief I'm feeling right now. EDIT: Typos.

50 comments

[–] Blathers 12 points (+12|-0)

It's not the biggest difference but the most immediate difference I noticed from Reddit is when I have a notification here, before I click on it, I don't wonder if it's going to be a death or rape threat from some rage-fueled lunatic.

[–] vauqueline 3 points (+3|-0)

Same. On Reddit, the first thing I did after submitting a comment was to turn off notifications. We don't have that feature here yet, but I'm not feeling the need for it either.